Winds of Solitude

I chased the winds that follow you
clinging to the ends of every strand
that dashed toward the still waters of the East
moving briskly towards an unknown end

I chased the winds that follow you
It moved through pristine forests and seas
And in ominous roads, tunnels, and cliffs
It turned me bruised as I clung

I chased the winds that follow you
The sun fed my unquenched spirit to follow
In turbulence I clinched in both hands
Pushing against the devastating force of the rage

I chased tightly to the winds that follow you
My life moved against the inevitable
My tears flew swift behind the shadows
That even the shadows constantly wished to set free

A louder call of the East reverberating
Have caused the wind to move swiftly and go
I tried to chase the last strand of the winds that follow you
Yet the strand of the wind has gone out of sight

The pasture of change cushioned the fall
The sun was up, yet I see nothing but darkness
Solitude wrapped the inside of my bashed spirit
And the brokenness left me nothing but empty

In this cruel fate I stood bold from the fall
Like how the horizon brings the sun back to life
And in stride I walk back to my lost, true self
Back to the self where I truly belong.

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The Worth of A Battle

If there's ONE THING i want to change instantly other than to let somebody come back to me, would be to cut off my OJT, and transfer to another site with this reason: While on my way up to the seemingly insurmountable boondocks of Valenica, the nature - everything around me cuts within, seems to splice my heart into pieces as some reminiscences flood down my brain stems. I've cried my heart out. AGAIN, and again, and again.

Well, work hours at Energy Development Corporation could be easily described in two words - drifting, dragging. We didn't have enough work to combat drowsiness, with the chill from cold air conditioner, switched to the lowest temperature - just as cold as how she feels for me.

This is indeed a mellow drama. My dramatically excruciating battle to win somebody back again also seemed to me as a war of my thoughts versus my heart. It was the most not-as-easy-as-it-sounds heartbreak in my life, that literally ceased my world's turn. My life stopped and i felt the need of picking up my broken self on the floor. The pain of picking my broken self down made me believe that I've expected and invested emotions toward one person all that much.

After days of battle, emotional oppression and debacle, i ceased the long fight. I laid my cards down, i threw the ball off the court, I stopped running the race in the oval, I smashed the dice, I laid the joystick down - i QUIT and shut the game off.

Just like a real-life battle, losing it was not easy. I was scathed and felt abandoned - my life brought me back to the hell i once was.

My life went on, on a different pace. I was treading on a new, changed, and different life. I still wake up early to wait for the company bus to fetch me, and like as it always was, i have no enough work to do.Finally, I bumped on a chapter of my my two-year old book entitled, "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff" in an unintentional and unplanned reason.

The chapter entitled, "CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES WISELY" built up my life quickly back again, that i finished reading the 100-chapter book for only two days. I read the lines, LIFE is filled with opportunities to choose between making a deal out of something or letting it go, realizing it doesn't really matter."

Lines like "Ask yourself the QUESTION, 'Will this Matter a Year from Now?'" opened my eyes into the realization I never expected myself to value so much. I realized that if I don't want to "sweat the small stuff," its critical for me to choose my battles wisely. If I do, there will come a day that I'll rarely feel the need to do the battle at all.

After everything, i closed the book on its 100th chapter and realized how much wasted effort I've invested but lost... BUT THEN, "the battle, indeed, was not worth fighting for."

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Straight or not Straight?

Below are two pictures. The first one was taken sometime 15 years ago. The second one was taken December 2008. Don’t be duped! The first picture isn't me. It’s my brother Germano Aba, now 30 something, working and living apart from our family for about 11 years now. He is probably the only person in the world who has the closest facial profile with mine (except Joe Jonas, of course) that even my neighbors and grandparents often makes me a misnomer. Worse, even my parents erroneously call me with his name in some of our conversations.

(BEFORE AND AFTER? 1980's vs. 2008 - two decades now, and I'm still young. hehe..)












But this doesn’t drag me up to my insecurity even when my parents, sisters and relatives often tells me that "Manong" was more handsome than I do. lol. I love my being me, even if there’s someone who apparently looks like me 15 years ago! =)

But just so you know, he’s 5’9 in height, Silliman University CBA cheerdancer in the 80’s, FU Cheerdancer of the same decade, host and public speaker, vain, hot guy (according to cousins), barkadista, cream-of-the-crop – and yes, Gay (No, not the cross-dresser guys, just the so-called “discreet”).


As a matter of fact, he’s living with somebody. Together, for almost 10 years now, they both own a small business with a computer station in Manila – and happy. My brother goes to his work in Quezon City, while Ike, his partner, takes charge of the business at home.

You may ask, why am I getting these issues out about someone who has caused degradation and shame to my family?

This is actually my first blog that talks about homosexuality… and this seems so interesting. Well, months ago, I was tasked by the publication to write a column on gender issues and sexuality. While typing down my thoughts, it flamed my concern with how homosexuals these days are insulted, and emotionally abused by people who have less understanding of their kind, and who have less concern for their cause. Scribbling information, I couldn’t think less than my brother who has now recovered out from the discrimination of other people during his college. He even had girlfriends then, jived with tough guys, had musculinity all over, etc... etc... But as for his experience, suppression of what is innate in one’s sexuality only causes more confusion and frustration. That time, my brother chose happiness rather than the torment of living with somebody, and facing the consequences of a suppressed life.

Now, his story also reminded me that not all men who look very straight, not all men who jive with men’s bandwagon are straight guys, as the magazine says, “Straight man is the new gay."

There are even a lot of them, whom I secretly know anyway, still does the same thing with what my brother did – jiving with guys as much as they could to cover too soon what has become, well, in many instances, an obvious and dubious act. These gays have not gone out of public rather, suppressing themselves in the boundaries of being man.

I am not discriminating those who try to be unnatural to cause others to think the other way. The fact that these kinds are also discriminating those who get “out” or the “confessed discreet gays,” makes me and some people raise eyebrows. Worst, they never know that people are already talking behind them.

To combat these, those people should know the rule of living a life: Be who you are. My brother never have had to be "womanized" to live a life he wished to. Let it out, but live a life accordingly. With that, just like my brother, you will get the apt respect you needed.

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Stand Proud, Tanjayanon!

"Ting... ting... Tanjayanon jud ka ting!"

Rather than being irritated with my classmates and friends with that "Tanjayanon expression," I instead, laugh with them. In fact, I am guilty with using such words whenever I get bored, sad, or embarrassed just like, "Ting, ulawa..." or "Ting Kapuya," or "Ting, paeta!"

That has obviously become a somewhat like "Trademark" to the people of Tanjay through the years, and it is the only term that sets us apart from others, anywhere else.

Just last month when I delivered my report to the class... my teacher asked where I come from. From then on, she doesn't call me with my name quite that much, but she calls me "TAGA-TANJAY" instead. But it somehow gives me that sense of pride inside when she mentions that Tanjayanons are known for being professional people - the City in Negros Oriental with the most number of successful provincial politicians, Nurses, Doctors, Engineers, Singers, Lawyers, composers, celebrities (hehe), intelligent ones...etc.


Just during these recent years, my cousin, whom i am very proud of, Mr. Junmar Aba ranked 2nd during the Nursing Licensure examinations, whole archipelago (well, he now works in Michigan with some of the relatives). Another family friend, now known as Atty. Fua, the Bedan Lawyer, bagged the 7th place in the bar examinations (whole Philippines) last year.
















Flicks: Sinulog de Tanjay and the church facade.










And who would forget the PDA scholars, Chivas and Bunny Malunda, my two scholmates in Diaz College whom I have contended with during the Campus Duet Singing Contest in 2005? And to note that the PBB housemate Nicole, my high schol classmate's close cousin is actually a Tanjayanon too!


My English teacher, going back, also tells the class the fact that the houses in Tanjay are so-called "dili mahutdan ug lapida," since a lot of houses display the family achievements on that hanging pices of wood outside their houses - e.g, Juan de la Cruz, Lawyer; Juana de La Cruz, Engineer... etc., most especially on a particular baranggay.

Modesty aside though, there have really been alot of professionals in Tanjay, i should say. When I was in gradeschool, my classmates where mostly sons and daughters of doctors, lawyers, businessmen, dentists and teachers... that time, i was not putting a big deal over it since I have had those classmates since my kindergarten. Our Elementary valedictorian in Plaza Central named Vincent, in fact, enjoys his scholarship in Ateneo de Manila now, being Science High Dumaguete's Valedictorian during my graduation times.

This "high professional rate thing," according to my English teacher is because many Tanjayanons in their time in Silliman particularly, persevere harder than any other groups at school... that even when families could no longer afford tuition fees, they continually send their children amid the consequence of facing their debts.

And well for me., this is now displayed in the growing number of Tanjayanons who are now, if not working in a well compensated job, working abroad successfully, living in American lifestyles, but with Filipino-Tanjayanon spirit. This, i think, why there have been a common negative impression about Tanjay people in many places, assuming that Tanjayanons are "hambog" (boastful) with their academic performance or skill... of irritating other people through their annoying voices during informal conversations.

But there are really alot more to be proud of, Tanjayanons. As I scanned the net hours ago, I bumped into Tanjay City's profile and there, I knew that there indeed are many things to be proud of. Here's a list of some successful Tanjayanons:

* Eddie S. Romero - National Artist of the Philippines for Movie - (actually, my paternal grandfather's relative).

* Nadia Montenegro - former child star.

* Butch L. Miraflor - Top Philippines Musical Director, who currently works for Music at GMA Network.

* David Cabello Martinez - Don Carlos Palanca Award for Literature Awardee

* Carmen Y. Miraflor - former Director of the Center for Integrated Systems at Stanford University

* Dr. Amalia M. Velarde - former Director of the National Scholarship Center

* Marilyn Velarde Aquino - Queen International 2001

* Sen. Rene Espina - Philippine Senator

* Atty. Miguel Luis R. Romero - former Representative

* Dr. Jose V. Romero - former Philippine Ambassador to the Republic of Italy

* Sen. Jose E. Romero - former Philippine Senator and Philippine Ambassador to the Court of St. James in England

* Nicky Alcantara - Singer/actor/model.

* Chivas Malunda - Pinoy Dream Academy scholar

* Bunny Malunda - Pinoy Dream Academy scholar

* Sheila Alonso - Miss Philippines Fire 2004

* Regidor Y. Miraflor - former Vice President of the United Coconut Planters Bank (UCPB) of the Philippines.

*with, well...

* Rizalina Calumpang - Miss Negros Oriental 1926

* Dr. Estela Navarro de Calumpang - Miss Negros Oriental 1960 etc.


These and more could probably be the reason why Tanjayonons are hambog or whatever... something runs down deep within our veins - the culture of pride. Ting! expression never ends.

time pa, kaon sa ko budbud...

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Geesh... American Idol Comes Back again!!

The american idol season 7 (last year) left me with a big disappointment, most of which about David Cook's trail to success, week after every week. I was always thinking he is utmost arrogant, but he's voice though is truly an undebatable issue. But well, the phenomenal guy didn't leave me disappointed when season 7 closed curtains though. And he became my last choice during his smack-down fight with the fresh and teenage Archuleta. But it sure was an unexpected decision from the 3 comical judges... and then....




It's been almost a year, and it flashed on the television set once again. SHOCK! Really.

This is really it! American Idol comes back to life again and this is just one reason that I'd be glued on my television set more than ever. I relived my memories of how the Davids and the rest of the team rocked last year even in the American Idol Marathon at Star World yesterday, and they're all "still as good as before!".. And my goodness, the Host, Ryan Seacrest is simply my gauge of a perfect host.

And what's even more interesting i heard, is that more and more filipinos are auditioning this time. To them, i give out my wishes!

This is another chance to get crazy and hooked with television. Farewell to nightouts and strolling, its time for american idol season 8! weee..

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Vegetarianism and Animals

I bumped into this hilarious picture which is said to be posted as cover of a magazine sometime ago. It has the caption, “IF YOU DON’T BUY THIS MAGAZINE, WE'LL KILL THIS DOG!”

I guess its only a lampoon issue of the magazine, as written, so I was quite relieved that it was really not intended. But seeing the photo with the gun pointed on the dog's head gives me another thought or view of the picture - that it actually HAPPENS in REAL LIFE - in the streets of Project 2, in Quezon City; in Cebu, even in Tanjay! (LOL)

Humans could be this bad. Below is the photo.


There have been many people raising up against the unethical treatment of animals around the world. As a matter of fact, I know alot of them. Some, even encouraged me to join too! But the challenge isn't as easy as it sounds. Bearing the membership, or the name, "vegetarian" (those who are not into eating meat but veggies for the sake of either loosing weight/being healthy or pathetically, to lessen the "animal crimes"), demands the challenge of being a lifetime pro-vegetable, anti-meat!

Pero Pinoy ako eh. I eat meat and chicken like most Filipinos but still entertains the possibility that someday, I could survive eating fish, milk and rice the whole time, not only for the purpose of keeping myself fit, but to really stand up for being PRO-ANIMAL!

I have a number of friends who have actually stood up on being a vegetarian. A friend of mine, Mark, is a Vegan. My Bacolodnon foster Ate, Ms. Megan Villanueva is a pescatarian, PLUS, she has survived this far without the presence of coffee in her house, or anywhere else!

But for those intrested like me, we should be carefully eductated with the nature of its course. Here, I've pasted the 6 most popular and leading types of vegetarians in the world:

A Pescatarian is occasionally used to describe those who abstain from eating all meat and animal flesh with the exception of fish. Flexitarians are those who eat a mostly vegetarian diet, but occasionally eat meat. Vegans do not eat meat of any kind and also do not eat eggs, dairy products, or processed foods containing these or other animal-derived ingredients such as gelatin. Other types of vegetarian diet include Lacto-ovo Vegetarian, Raw Vegan, and Macrobiotic.

So, ANO... I DARE YOU!!

But know what, I find the vegetarians who abstain from eating meat for the sake of saving these animals pathetic in clinging on to what they believe because whether they win a thousand of people who would follow them and their beliefs, still... a huge number of people around the world shouts for meat.

It's 7:30 in the evening now, my tummy is half empty, and starving. And just like them, in my mind i see some meat served on the table when I come home from this office. uhu. Mukang di talaga pwede! =)

-Royalty Bisyoso

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